I need your guys advice.. I have been in relationship for two years now...everything was great at the beginning. She been having finicial issues as of late and taking care of her elderly parents and 8 year old child..I have been helping her on the finicial side and also helping her with other errands..It has been of late that she has been pushing me away when i want to carress or hug her..Our sex life is no longer there since she wants to give more of her life to christ and considers it fornication ..This has been going on for months now..When I mention how I feel she gets upset and brushes it off by changing the subject..Recently I really express my displeasure with her and told her that I need more love and affecttion  and that also my own finances is taking a hit with helping her out..This hurt her feelings tremenlously , she describes it has a stab in her heart..Right now she doesn't feel right in this relationship. We are about get together  later  this week to discuss our feelings.. There are also other issues on my part that I don't feel right about, one example is she has been mistakenly calling me by her ex - husband's name about three times if i can remember....please let me know what should be done...

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DOC

 richard77 wrote:I need your guys advice.. I have been in relationship for two years now...everything was great at the beginning. She been having finicial issues as of late and taking care of her elderly parents and 8 year old child..I have been helping her on the finicial side and also helping her with other errands..It has been of late that she has been pushing me away when i want to carress or hug her..Our sex life is no longer there since she wants to give more of her life to christ and considers it fornication ..This has been going on for months now..When I mention how I feel she gets upset and brushes it off by changing the subject..Recently I really express my displeasure with her and told her that I need more love and affecttion  and that also my own finances is taking a hit with helping her out..This hurt her feelings tremenlously , she describes it has a stab in her heart..Right now she doesn't feel right in this relationship. We are about get together  later  this week to discuss our feelings.. There are also other issues on my part that I don't feel right about, one example is she has been mistakenly calling me by her ex - husband's name about three times if i can remember....please let me know what should be done...

1. You are not her husband so you don't have to pay her bills. I understand that you are tying to be nice but at this point that is not your reponisiblity..

2. Back off give her space but don't let her use you either. I know that you love her but allow her to do what she has to  for her family.

3. Re-evalute your relationship see what it is realy about, meaning see if it is just a sexual thing or is she someone that you can possibly be with for a minute. If so you can wait for old girl sexually. I know it is hard. But man I waited like almost two years before I got married to have sex with her and it was well worth it.

Be Patient my brother if you have longterm goals with her.

If she's calling you by her ex-husband name, slowly pushing you away, don't want to have sex with you plus get upset when you ask why and then get upset because you can no longer support her financially, that should tell you something. You a fool though. You are hurting yourself financially to support someone else. To me it sound like she ain't really feelin' you but that just me. I would tell her look for a 2nd job cause I ain't givin' you sheeeid :)

as a female myself i think that this is a very ungrateful woman there are some women who cant even get a penny out there man and u are helping her and this is how she repays u. i believe something is up because when me and my ex relationship got rocky and i stop wanting to have sex with him is because i was no longer feeling him in a sexual way because i got bored and tired of him. u sound like a very good and supportive man. there are females like me that will love a guy like u. if she dont make changes pronto move on. i know something aint right cause i started acting like that with my ex b4 we broke up cause i didnt wanna be with him anymore. talk to her first though so u can see what it really is. i wish u the best.

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Attitudes are contagious , is yours worth catching?

Trust me it's either she is truly depressed or she is not feeling you. I was in the same situation and I had to let him go 'cause I felt so wrong. I cared for him and wanted to stay with him 'cause he was a good man, but my heart just couldn't love him. So that may be the case. She probably is holdin on to you 'cause you are a good man. So just let her know whats on your mind, do not feel guilty about anything 'cause she is acting funny.

Either this woman is still involved with her ex-husband sexually and emotionally or she is genuinely confused.  I understand that she is experiencing a difficult situation within her life, but that is not an adequate reason for neglecting the man within her life.  You two need to discuss all of the feelings and the entire situation before progressing any further.

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There are no elevators to success. Every one must take the stairs.

richard77 I WOULD JUST SAY TELL HER HOW YOU FEEL AND KEEP IT REAL WITH HER . AND LET HER KNOW THAT HOW WOULD SHE FEELIF YOU CALL HER ANOTHER WOMENS NAME. IT JUST SOUNDS LIKE SHE'S GOING THROUGH SOMETHING AND SHE NEEDS YOUR HELP. HOPE YOU AND HER CAN WORK IT OUT.

Both of yall our wrong. if you love her you would respect her wishes to wait until she got marriedbut, at the same time she would not be calling you by her ex husbands name yall need 2 talk and if it doesn't work out yall should go yall seperate ways

 richard77 wrote:I need your guys advice.. I have been in relationship for two years now...everything was great at the beginning. She been having finicial issues as of late and taking care of her elderly parents and 8 year old child..I have been helping her on the finicial side and also helping her with other errands..It has been of late that she has been pushing me away when i want to carress or hug her..Our sex life is no longer there since she wants to give more of her life to christ and considers it fornication ..This has been going on for months now..When I mention how I feel she gets upset and brushes it off by changing the subject..Recently I really express my displeasure with her and told her that I need more love and affecttion  and that also my own finances is taking a hit with helping her out..This hurt her feelings tremenlously , she describes it has a stab in her heart..Right now she doesn't feel right in this relationship. We are about get together  later  this week to discuss our feelings.. There are also other issues on my part that I don't feel right about, one example is she has been mistakenly calling me by her ex - husband's name about three times if i can remember....please let me know what should be done...She is mistakenly calling you by her ex-husband's name because she is secretly seeing him on the side.  She is probably keeping you around because 1. you give her money and 2. just in case it doesn't work out with the ex again, she will have someone to fall back on.  You need to step back from the situation before you get hurt.